I am really struggling. I was married for almost ten years and have two children. My husband and I have been to court three times already. At the last hearing, the judge asked both attorneys if all issues were resolved and both said yes – but my ex and his attorney have not completed the necessary paperwork and are totally unresponsive.
My attorney wants another hearing, but I’m praying for another way out. I have spent over $50K and am flat broke. His child support was reduced by 42% and I am responsible for the mortgage. I was a stay-at-home mom and had to find a job in the 2008 economy. So I had to take what I could get. What options do I have at this point?
I cannot give you legal advice as I am not an attorney and matrimonial laws change from state to state, province to province.
Options? You either resolve to move forward by learning how to let go of the past or stay stuck where you are. I know it sounds simple but it really does come down to that. What do you want your life to look like in one year and what will it take you to get there? Concentrate on what is under your control because we need to let go of the things that we cannot control and for the most part, we can only control how we choose to handle a situation/challenge. Remember the serenity prayer? If not, look it up on line and use it as your blueprint.
Start making small steps toward your goal. In addition, take good care of yourself by exercising and perhaps taking up yoga to reduce the effects of stress on your mind and body. Make that commitment to yourself because you need all the resources you can get your hands on now.
There are always different ways of doing things and options to solving a problem. If what you have been doing is not serving you then try doing things differently. Reduce the occurrences of thing that upset you and increase the things that make you feel good.
Hope this helps.
Shelley Stile is an ACC certified Divorce Recovery Life Coach and author who guides her clients to let go the pain of their divorce and move on to create new and vibrant lives after divorce. Shelley has been through her own divorce so she knows first-hand about the journey of divorce recovery. Receive her free, powerful e-book, The 10 Secrets to Coping with Divorce’, and her monthly ‘Take Back Your Life After Divorce’ Newsletter by going to: http://www.freedivorcesupport.com.